Post Grad

Well, graduation was full of fatty, nasty foods, tons of family, and a large amount of money and gifts. I gave myself a week off from dieting, and then got my period, so ate enough for a small army as well as all the children in Africa, but I'm still on a post graduation high, so I haven't felt guilty about it. Meeting a new and wonderful girl isn't hurting either. I'm looking forward to a summer of eating right, working out (finally back to having a country club, thank God), and finding new love.

Also, I did not make my goal of 165 for graduation. I'm disappointed, but not letting it get me down. I start every day new, and I will get to my ultimate goal, and I will love myself so much. One day at a time. 

My, What Nice Legs You Have

Oops.

Ate dinner about an hour ago. Purged. I've never done that before.

1. It was disgusting. Almost completely undigested food coming back out of your mouth is repulsive. Made me vomit even more.

2. I'm mad that I spent money on dinner, only for it to end up in the toilet.

3. I have a new sense of respect for Mia's-- I don't condone eating disorders, even though, let's be honest I basically have one.

4. I hate myself because I feel way less guilty than I would have if I'd kept that shit in my stomach.

5. Fuck.

And flavor SUCKS coming back up. 

Ten Days

Overwhelmed. Frustrated with school. Graduation is in ten days, and I am so behind. I'm worried I won't pass one class, and then my parents would kill me. I've been so anxious, and I tend to stress vomit-- not on purpose, I hate puking-- and my stomach is in a constant knot. I've decided to not drink at all until graduation; that's a long time for me, I usually can't go more than a day! Ha. But it will help me to get my work done and probably shed a few pounds. Beer has so many calories, and I drink it like it's my job. Really hoping for a good next week and a half. I'm almost done. I've almost made it.

Stay strong.